Hello Beautiful Human, This week, a personal story.
Yesterday my son and I walked around our block picking up litter (he was earning back screen time he had previously forfeited).
The sensation of filling our bags as cars drove by took me back to my high school janitor job that included picking up trash in a parking lot and hauling the big bags of leaky sticky trash to the dumpster.
The memory came to my mind more vividly than what I did last week.
As one of the very few ethnic minorities in a predominantly white community, I used to wondered what people thought of me cleaning up trash.
Would they assume I had gotten in trouble and was doing community service? Which negative stereotype would they ascribe as they drove by?How would they know I was an honor roll student and varsity athlete?
I remember one time I deliberately decided not to change out if my track jersey after a meet as I rushed to work. Like any human, I wanted to be seen for my potential.
I shake my head with a good dose of compassion for that young girl when I contemplate my former overthinking self. How salient the experience in my mind. I now acknowledge that what I was experiencing was the annoying cognitive load that so many BIPOC (Black, Indigenous, People of Color) carry. It's particularly heavy when we feel like we have to wait for others to approve of our belonging and credentials.
Now, I wish I could have told my younger self, "You are smart, you're hardworking, you're strong, and you really don't have to spend an ounce of energy on the thoughts of others."
But I didn't believe that I was smart for another 20 years and multiple degrees later. Being dyslexic and struggling to spell left me with a self-perception of 'not that smart' that I assumed was true, which limited my confidence and capacity for years (until I started working with a coach and healing certain parts of my identity).
I wish I could tell my younger self that the unease I felt about others limiting me to a negative assumed racial stereotypes stemmed from living in a racialized society, and that this burden isn't mine to carry.
Others' limited thinking or understanding of who I am is not a problem, especially when I know who I am, and accept all of me.
It would be another 10 years until I could begin to articulate the value of my ethnicity and cultural background when I studied Latino Leadership in graduate school.
I wish I could tell myself that I only felt bad picking up trash because society undervalues service labor (really any job held by Black and Brown bodies despite the skills and incredible value), underpays it, and then criminalizes being poor.
Day labor, farm labor, and caretaking all have value. I am so grateful for the path I walked, which keeps me from undervaluing the work of others regardless of the economic spreadsheet of supply and demand. As a business and economics undergrad major, I understand the capitalists' excuse for low wages and I don't buy it.
I also know that when organizational leaders really understand the value of all labor they can and do transform workplaces through equitable pay and praise.
I did not expect that my creative parentingβ making my kiddo get out of the house and into the physical world to serve his community by picking up trash would bring up pieces of my embodied experiences and identity.
Perhaps you can relate to the unnecessary cognitive load I carried as a teenager and into my adulthood. If so, I'd love to hear about it.
Perhaps the bits and pieces of your story covered in shame and hidden in the back of your mind are actually valuable insights waiting to be reframed and used in your powerful authentic leadership journey.
Leadership is far more than credentials and tactics.
It is who we are.
How we see ourselves, societies influence and the way we decide to reframe, rewrite, and radically claim our unique brilliance and inner resources.
At times, I struggle to communicate the profound transformation possible through holistic coaching.
Perhaps this story can demonstrate how our perceptions, fears, and hopes within our nervous system and embodied memories influence the way we move, interpret, and show up in the world.
You don't have to feel stuck due to past professional injuries or longtime stories and over thinking draining your energy.
You are beautiful, your journey is meaningful, and your desire to live in your full potential is worthy of pursuing.
Whether you are curious about 1:1 coaching or the upcoming Group Coaching option now is the time to grab a spot on my calendar.
βBook a discovery session today. I've opened extra time for us to connect over the next two weeks.
Use this link for extended hours. ‡
ππ½ββοΈ Ready to say YES to being held, supported and experience deep transformation with the fall cohort of Wired for Joy & Empowerment?
βEnrollment is Open Now. See you Inside.
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Group Coaching Details:
- Start Date - Friday Sep. 11, 12 pm CT
- 12 sessions - Bi-weekly Β· 60 min
- A supportive WhatsApp Group
- Coaching on your specific situation
- Nervous system, habit creation, & leadership identity support
- Session recordings to support any missed weeks and deeper learning.
- A community to celebrate your growth.
- Investment: $1200 - $200/month over 6 months or $1000 pay in full.
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Con mucho amor,
p.s. If you enjoyed my story I bet you'll love the children's book, The Paper Kingdom. β
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